If I Was Still In College, I'd be Wasted Right Now

Don't judge me, hear me out, I have my reasoning.  Today is Friday, I don't teach on Friday's, I normally eat lunch at school- but not on Fridays.  On Friday's I have lunch at home with Tia Marina and Suzy; but not today.  I'm not sure where they went because when I woke up they were gone.  But Tia Marina, being the fantastic grandmother that she is, cooked and left me a schmorgeshboard offering on the table.  Spaghetti with scrambled egg, some limp, oil-soaked potatoes (I'm sorry they don't qualify as french fries), a steak that was thinner than the beautiful new ultra-thin MacBook Air, a cut up tomato and some sandwich-ready shredded romaine.  Crunchy!

I put together a big-boy sized platter and seeing as it was a beautiful day, went outside to the nice little asado-gazebo-outdoor kitchen area (take that Bobby Flay).  I had a great little outdoor picnic in the sun but suddenly found myself thinking about the good ol' days at Colorado College; inevitably, causing a lot of mayhem, usually with a healthy amount of alcohol involved.  Now, there is no question that this area reminds me in many ways of Colorado, the climate, mountains and more, but it wasn't that.  "What," you might be asking, "does eating lunch in the sun at a beautiful outdoor kitchen have to do with college, or being wasted?"  "Surely, you didn't have a fully equipped outdoor asado shack in college, did you?"  Unfortunately, the answer is no, we didn't; but I tried damn hard!  So what about this experience reminded me of my glory years at Colorado College?  

You see, as I was sitting there eating, I couldn't help but watch the traffic speed by on the PanAmerican.
Even though the highway was less than 50 yards away from me, all I could make out was each car's color.  My two roomates and I also happened to live on a very busy street our last year at CC.  What did we do when we were bored?  We would crack open a beer and drink to our livers dismay!  Inevitably we quickly tired of just plain-old drinking and we always managed to invent some new drinking game to help boost the fun factor (you can really make any mindless activity into a drinking game): Wii Tennis, Playstation Baseball, even the song "Black Betty".  One of my favorites however, was traffic.  The premise of this simpleton game is so easy that only a drunk could enjoy it (are you sensing a trend?).  The rules are as follows: sit on the front stoop with a 30-rack, pick a color and any time a car of that color drives by, you drink.

Cheers to living on the side of the highway!

Avocados and Kids: Avocados

Avocados and Kids; for better or worse, that's basically what my life consists of.  Let's talk about the former.  There are avocados on everything- literally EVERYTHING.  Breakfast time?   How do you like your toast, margarine and avocado or just avocado?   Hungry before lunch (perhaps you didn't like your avocado toast this morning)?  How about a hot dog?  Oh don't worry, your lightly boiled tube of mystery meat (read: flaccid) is down there in the bun somewhere; buried deep beneath a few mashed up avocados, an ice cream sized scoop of mayo and don't forget the ketchup and mustard!  These things, known as completo italiano, put the Chicago Dog to shame!  And I am not talking about taste but the sheer size and impossibility of fitting the damn thing in your mouth.  The taste, in case you were wondering, is...well, as you would expect.  I like some strange combinations and am especially fond of sausage (you really can't go wrong with meat in tube form) but these just fall flat in every category and have an oddly gummy texture.  Not to mention avocado and ketchup, the Silverman in me is balking!  I digress.  Dinner time?  How about a ubiquitous ave palta con mayo?  Here comes your avocado and mayo sandwich, enjoy the side of turkey.

At this point, you are probably saying to yourself, "wow, Chilean food sounds terrible."  This however, is not the entire story!  I for one, am getting hungry while writing this and would happily devour a big f***ing completo right now, gummy or not.  I am lucky however in that I don't have to.  By some stroke of luck (especially considering my previous homestay experience), a fantastic family decided to take me in and play host to me for 6 months.  I swear, I like them more and more every day!  

We live on a farm, on the side of the PanAmericano, in the middle of Chile's Fruit Bowl (which is to say in many ways, the middle of nowhere).  It's rural, real rural; when I look out my window I can see: cows, horses, fruit trees, the smoke of wood-fired heaters in hastily constructed homes of corrugated steel, burning trash piles and of course, I can hear and feel the roar of trucks whizzing by on the PanAmerican.  But there are also some sweet mountains (La Campaña for one, summited by none other than Mr. Charles Darwin).  Sure, it has its downsides (and yes I will gripe about them at some point, most likely a lot) but at the end of the day the family rocks!  As far as food is concerned, I am really grateful that the back entryway to our house looks like the storeroom of the farm next door (maybe it is?)  Even though I eat a lot of Chilean grown fruit back in the US, it doesn't taste nearly this good.  Even the avocados, they are sweet, silky and incredible; I just can't believe that there is a freaking avocado on my hot dog.